Wednesday, May 11, 2005

British Assault on Baseball

In a sign of muted anti-Americanism, a British mall has decided to ban baseball caps.

Mall bans shoppers' hooded tops

Hooded tops, baseball caps and swearing have been outlawed at Bluewater shopping centre in Kent as part of a crackdown on anti-social behaviour.

Guidelines say intimidating behaviour by groups or individuals, anti-social behaviour including swearing, and wearing clothing which deliberately obscures the face such as hooded tops and baseball caps, will not be allowed.

Now, I don’t know how you wear your baseball cap, but I’ve never been able to obscure my face with one. I’ve conducted my own attempt to replicate this procedure and have pulled the bills off of two hats in the process. Granted, they were Orioles caps, but the point stands.

It would take a 10 gallon baseball cap to accomplish this feat. I don’t think any such caps are in production. The only person I can think of that obscures any part of his face with a baseball cap is our own Chad Cordero. I think he is still recognizable.

This is obviously an attempt by the Brits to bring down baseball. They simply don’t like the fact that baseball players get to wear those cool caps while Cricket players look like geeky pencilheads. I think this is worth a complaint to the UN or the World Court. First the French ban headscarves and now this. The EU has a lot to answer for.

(Before you send me hate mail, re-read the above and ask yourself, is Tran serious?)

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